Oh, well, this is some pretty shit.

My mom IMed me (in fact, is STILL IMing me) this morning. Allow me to share:

Mom: Good morning!

hamlette2002: morning mom

hamlette2002: how are you doing?

Mom: We have a new baby in the family.

hamlette2002: we had a loss in the family as well

hamlette2002: uncle bob passed away

Mom: When? What happened?

hamlette2002: he had another heart attack a couple of weeks ago

hamlette2002: i couldn't get through your phone line

hamlette2002: aunt betty tried too

Mom: do you have a number that I can reach Betty with?

hamlette2002: i might still have it - hold on

Mom: Or Katrina?

hamlette2002: no, it got wiped off of the board

hamlette2002:

Mom: do you have an email address for her?

hamlette2002: NO

hamlette2002: oops

hamlette2002: sorry about the caps

Mom: it's ok, I know you didn't mean to yell. Was he still living in Bullhead City?

hamlette2002: yeah

hamlette2002: aunt betty came down to help katrina with the arrangements

Mom: She's a good lady. She really did love him once.

hamlette2002: i know

hamlette2002: wow, who is S LaLonde in kingman?

hamlette2002: and who is the new addition to the family?

Mom: Next time you have important news, could you please email me if you can't get me by phone? I only have one line, and with no tv or radio, I'm online a lot. S. La Londe? I have no idea...Maybe we better call and find out? One of dad's "happy accidents" maybe?

hamlette2002: lol

hamlette2002: okay

hamlette2002: the last time i emailed you, it said your account didn't exist, so i thought you had closed it out

Mom: The new addition is a 21-month old baby girl that we're fostering.

hamlette2002: i didn't know you were doing foster care

Mom: I wasn't planning on it, lol. Remember the little girl you saw on web cam last summer?

hamlette2002: i can't even find a listing online for her

hamlette2002: yeah?

Mom: Her parents have asked me to keep her while they self-destruct on meth and booze.

hamlette2002: great

Mom: So I applied to the foster parents program and got us appointed as guardians.

Mom: The parents split up, Sasha went with her mum, and they've been couch-hopping (homeless) ever since.

hamlette2002: so what happens next?

Mom: If they don't complete rehab and find adequate housing and employment in the next 6 months, we're going to petition the court to allow us to adopt her. Neither parent has made contact...

Mom: I think it would be so ironic that the only child I was able to raise start to finish was someone else's

hamlette2002: i'm grateful for the fun memories

hamlette2002: i'm lucky that you were so creative, and clever, and involved

Mom: She came with us when we took our group of foster home guys to Disneyland. I'm glad I gave you some of the good stuff.

Mom: I'm grateful in turn that you turned out so well in spite of my creativity, lol

hamlette2002: lol

Mom: It looks like your kids may wind up with an auntie several years younger than they are. It feels so strange lugging around a diaper bag again.

Now, some of you may wonder why I can't really say much back to her, other than laughing. So here it goes:

The thought of that woman trying to raise more children makes me sick. What happens when she gets tired of it? Then what? Or what happens if something happens to her and Jim? God, I don't want to have to raise any more of "her" kids. I don't even believe that they'll be able to adopt anyway, between the fact that Jim is in remission from cancer, and she's almost 50. I see this as a deterrent. What if something happens to them? What kind of judge would award them an adoption? The kind that my mother can charm with all of her clever lies. *sigh* If there are gods, this will NOT happen. How would that make my sisters feel? "Well, she gave up custody of us, but she wants that baby that isn't even family." Hmm. Well, fuck, Mom, why don't you send them a shit bomb and tell them how you REALLY feel?

the last trail...the next path